A book review by Dr. Suzanne Phillips:
Brief and unpretentious, Audrey Cade’s book, Divorce Matters, Help for hurting hearts and why divorce is sometimes the best decision, offers readers a great deal with an insider voice that is supportive, informative and at times humorous. Drawing upon her own experience, Audrey Cade verifies that despite the statistics, divorce is a journey that most people don’t want to take. Differing from many others writing about divorce, this matriarch of a blended family of eight begins by being as clear about the need to take steps to try save your marriage, as she is realistic about the anguish of realizing you can’t.
In her first chapter she describes her personal road to divorce and challenges readers to consider twelve very important questions bearing on their marriage like: “What are the deal breakers? Can you forgive and move past infidelity, addiction, abuse… to the trust and security of your relationship?” Should you? Are you compatible in your beliefs when it comes to major issues…? Validating the emotional implications of ending a marriage, Audrey invites readers to make sure they can look in the mirror and look in their children’s eyes and know they did all they could.
What Audrey then provides is the when, why and how of coping with divorce. With examples, information and suggestions she addresses what most people facing divorce are rarely prepared to think about – much less handle. She underscores the need to grieve for what was lost and shares how often it is not until you find yourself in your new life that you feel that. She addresses the way to tell children and the reality “You never really know someone until the relationship is over!”
Drawing upon the support and lessons learned from other “ Divorce Warriors” (both men and women) with whom she connects along the way, she encourages making connections to help navigate the terrain - the inevitable Facebook gossip, the disappearance of some friends, the family reactions, the nerve-wracking legal maze, the alone time during visitation weekends, the appearance of unexpected old and new friends, the challenges and treasured moments with kids, the mastery of new tasks, the ability to forgive self, and the opportunities in the future to connect with another person…and sometimes their ex.
Audrey Cade’s book, Divorce Matters: Help for hurting hearts and why divorce is sometimes the best decision, is valuable advice without sugar coating. It will touch you and teach you.
I've got many ideas that I would love to tackle for a book. Right now I am working on a book about my story of parental alienation and another about the many unique faces of divorce. All of us have our own unique story. Would you care to share yours? Fill out an interview form, and help others heal from divorce!
Divorce is not for the faint of heart, yet it is a last resort that many of us find ourselves on the path to. Upon making the decision that divorce is inevitable, friendly words of encouragement from someone who's "been there and lived that" are just what's needed to get through the most trying times and emerge as a stronger individual. This book is a compassionate, frank, and comprehensive look at the major issues faced during the divorce process including: recognizing when it's the right thing to do, preparing for major life changes, parenting and co-parenting resilient kids, re-discovering your self and your strength, moving on to new relationships (including re-marriage and step parenting), and learning to discover the silver lining of an otherwise difficult chapter.
This guide to self-discovery and triumph over one of life's most distressing situations is lovingly penned by a divorce veteran, Audrey Cade, who can relate to the challenges of the single parent, remarriage after divorce, ex drama, parenting complications, and the roller coaster of blending families and step parenting. Cade invites the reader to accept the divorce process as an opportunity to find the power within, to revel in new milestones and accomplishments, and to learn to rediscover life in beautiful and different ways. Cade refuses to sugar coat the mountain of frustration and negativity that characterize divorce, and instead reveals the strategies that helped her and her family succeed in the face of heartbreak and disappointment to once again find happiness. Cade writes from the perspective of a girlfriend offering up the truthful scoop on what others may encounter along their journey and how she found the peace to accept her choice to find happiness again and to create the best possible environment for her children.